studying for my test.....studying for my test....studying for me test.......i'm here at work. i'm supposed to be working since i'm still on the clock, but i'm studying for my test........studying for my test. i've been reviewing the two chapters the test is going to be on, but everything i read isn't sticking. i hate when that happens. this stuff must be boring. i can usually remember the stuff if i read it more than once, but i've read it a million times and i still don't remember what the hell i read. i think i might know what the problem is. i'm so excited to head out of this place. i miss the fresh, crisp, air, blue skies, and mountains. tomorrow all i have is class and i will be off from work until monday. we will be leaving late wedesday night. i told brian to ask his boss if he could leave early wednesday night, but his boss told him that if he left early he would not get his holiday pay for thursday and friday. that really sucks. now if he would have stayed on the day shift this wouldn't have been a problem. oh well, i shouldn't be bitching at least we will finally get out of phoenix for a change.

Today, at school they were passing out our awards. they had a little student appreciation deal this afternoon. they supplied us with hotdogs, chips, and cake. that was thoughtful of the school. finally, they do something to appreciate us. anyway, i got my award certificates. i got one for attendance and the other award was for making the president's list with a 4.0 GPA. I felt really good receiving the certificates even though they may be just pieces of paper. deep down i felt like i finally accomplished some thing in my life. i wish i would have done this earlier in my life, but i shouldn't be complaining because it's good that i'm doing it now than not at all. now my goals will be to try and keep the 4.0, not to miss any school, graduate, get my certification as a medical coder, and then land a job that pays top dollar.

my weekend was very relaxing. it was peaceful actually. i had such a great time staying home and not doing a damn thing. i actually watched tv. wow. it was nice to watch all the shows that i used to watch. i love watching the osbournes. mtv had the osbourne marathon on saturday. i watched it all day. that show is hilarious. ozzy can be such a dork sometimes.

well, tomorrow will be my last day of work and i'm heading out to the reservation on wednesday. it will probably be like early thursday morning by the time we leave because brian doesn't get out until 11pm. it's very cold out here in phoenix so i'm wondering if it is snowing in flagstaff. i don't want to be caught in a snow storm. about 2 years ago i was leaving back to phoenix during christmas time and i got caught up in a wicked snow storm. it was the kind of snow storm where you could not see a thing front of you. that kind of weather i would really like to stay away from this thanksgiving. please lord pave my way back to the reservation........

shucks, it sucks this year. i don't get to cook this year. we are going to brians familys house. they told us to bring our tummies and nothing else. they say that they understand that we work hard and that we don't need to work up a sweat and cook something. that is very nice, but i will feel weird bringing myself and not bringing anything to the table. i will probably whip up some chocolate pecan pie to take over there. i did buy a turkey yesterday though. i like to wait until the last minute to buy a turkey because the closer it gets to thanksgiving the more the price of the turkey drops. my turkey yesterday was only 6 bucks. i was one happy camper. i will probably roast it the second week of december. i love turkey leftovers. you can use it for every thing.....turkey sandwiches, turkey enchiladas, use it in your salads, casseroles....etc. MMmmmmm...turkey!

yay! it's friday. i get to finally rest for the next two days. i am so tired right now. i need my bed. yes, i'm still at work. i won't leave from here until 12am. i've done a lot of work tonight and my brain seems to be throbbing. my brain is fed so much information every day. i just don't see how i do it. i didn't get to study last night either even though i stayed home from work to study. i just skimmed through the chapters and set my book aside. i got distracted by the tv. i don't watch tv any more so its a privilege when i do. oh by the way i got an 'A' on my test.

tomorrow, i will probably sleep in until noon and probably hit the mall and do the rest of my christmas shopping. i hate big crowds, especially the mall. there are too many weird people there so i try and stay away from the mall when ever i can. hope y'all have a good weekend. good night y'all.

I'm home today. i decided not to go to work today. i have to clear my mind of some things and to study for my test tomorrow. well, I had a big talk with the admissions representative at school today. she talked me into staying with my program. at first i was upset at the fact that they had fired my instructor. i liked her teaching methods and i definitely understood every thing she was teaching. i guess i was just mad at the fact that i've had 3 instructors since i started school about 2 1/2 months ago. the first instructor that i started out with was ditzy. her class was a joke and i eventually transferred out of there to the morning classes. i got situated and comfortable with the morning classes and then about 2 days ago the director of the school comes in and informs us that our instructor was fired. basicly her speech was short and to the point. it was mostly about how we shouldn't stir up any trouble or we will suffer the consequences. that speech from the director of the school made me feel threatened. it was like she was telling us to keep our comments and concerns to our selves and that we couldn't voice our opinion. fuck that. my tuition is close to $9,000 dollars and i definitely have the right to express my opinion on certain situations like this one.

anyway, i listened to some of the lecture today from the new instructor. he seems to know his stuff and hopefully he has extensive knowledge in medical coding because that is the only reason why I took the course. i am sticking to this and hopefully there will be no more negative situations like this again.

ok...today was a totally shitty day. i really don't know what to do now. i found out this morning that my instructor got fired. i feel like this is unfair. we got introduced to the new instructor today. i definitely do not like. i have been thinking so much today and well....i think i might be doing something that might either benefit me or not...i'm thinking about changing my program. i still have not talked to brian about it because i know his answer will be, "go ahead, do what you got to do" or "do whatever makes you happy". "you know i'm here for you". gosh, i love him so much. i need him right now, but i'm stuck here at work...anyway, that was my shitty day...good night y'all....:(

i need a few more gifts to look for. i think i have 3 left on my list. i still don't know what to get brian for christmas. i'm torn between his wish for tools (bleh, only men would want that kind of stuff) or a leather jacket. i really don't want to get him tools for christmas, but he keeps hinting around that he wants tools. then again, i saw this really nice leather jacket. i know it is something that he would definitely like, but the tag is a bit too pricey. i might have to do something drastic and charge the damn thing. i hate getting things on credit. i will have to see until december. i don't want to get his christmas gift early because last year he decided to open his birthday gift behind my back. i was dissappointed in him. i think i know why he decided to open his gift early though. i enticed him too much. i left his gift on the table two weeks before his birthday. i guess on that final week of his birthday he just said fuck it and carefully opened the gift. in the end, i of course found out. lol. its so funny to think about it now. i wanted it to be a surprise. his first ps2. lol. he doesn't play with it that much any more.

today, i went on a class trip to thunderbird samaritan hospital. wow. now, that is a hospital. patients are treated like kings and queens. they are so pampered. i would like to work there after i finish school. we toured the medical coding and billing department. gosh, i am so motivated again. for a couple of weeks i've been feeling really down and exhausted, but the tour today gave me some more motivation. I think after i graduate i might take a medical coding course at PCC so i can get certified. unless i study my ass off and pay the 280 dollars for the certification test. well, i guess all that will depend on whether i feel like i have to take another course. well, it's time to clock out...good nite y'all.

why do auto care places display that they are certified? yeah freaking right! i was at sears auto care on saturday and sunday. practially all damn day. oh man, it is a good thing my fiance knows how to change the brakes in vehicles because if he didn't we could have had a massive bill from sears. he changed my front brake discs and replaced all the brake pads. we decided to get the alignment done afterwards because the car has been driving a little funky for the past few months. it kept pulling to the left so that is why i decided to take the care in. anyway, we get there and we tell them we want an alignment. the guy at the front desk says, "ok, that will be $54.95 to get an alignment on your car". i agree with it. this place took 4 hrs to do my alignment on saturday. during these 4 hrs they had to test drive it and realign it twice. i finally got out of there about 30 minutes before closing. i paid my bill and left. brian and i jumped on the freeway to see if it was fixed. it wasn't. this time the car was pulling to the right. i was so pissed off. I felt like turning around and going back over there and have them fix it until they got it right, but it was late so i waited until sunday to take it back in again.

it's sunday morning. i was there right at 10am. that is when the place opens. i go in tell them my problem. they agree to take my car in again and see if they can fix it. i wait for 6 hrs. within those 6 hrs they come to me and say that i might have to buy 4 all new tires. i probably had so much disgust on my face because afterwards they offered me a discount on my tires. i take their offer for the discounted tires and i watch them as they mount the new tires on. then they go and check the alignment again. I'm sitting there waiting and watching. they have 4 technicians there trying to align my damn car again. Oh my gosh, i was thinking when will this ever end. they come back and tell me that they can't align it and say that maybe the machine that aligns the tires is off and needs to be checked so they tell me that they have to align my tires manually. they move my car in a different area and it takes 5 men to do this. after all this i'm sitting here and thinking maybe i bought my tires for nothing if they say that the machine isn't aligning the tires correctly. sheez, why does this kind of crap always happen to me? out of all that chaos i am minus 450 dollars.....i'm so disgusted.

i'm at work. Blah. i decided to drag my lazy ass in today. i could have worked yesterday, but i was so damn tired. i couldn't get myself to go. i just wanted to sleep in all evening, but to my surprise, i just couldn't. i tried so hard to make myself go to sleep. i even took some sleeping pills. it didn't work at all. i guess my body got used to staying awake for long hours at a time.

i heard a little while ago that there is some bad shit gonna be happening tomorrow regarding work. see, we bought software program from this particular company and well, we just found out that the software that we have been using for the past 5 months was not doing it's job. it is bugged. you know the bug that is in men in black at the end of the movie. it's as big as that. gosh, i'm thinking about all the clients we have been working with. all this time, we just didn't know. stupid software. this software is a big database, it holds a bunch of files, and well it's been giving clients wrong information. we have been giving clients wrong information since june. now i see why we haven't been landing new clients because of the fucking software. i hear there is going to be a humungous law suit. my boss is coming in from texas first thing saturday morning. i can't wait to see what this will entail.....

well, today wasn't the usual. i only had school today, yet i still feel tired. it feels like i worked today too. i think i might know the reason why i feel this way. i've been thinking about 'something' and i feel scared right now. i know that this 'something' is not what i want at this point in my life. a lot of things have been running through my pewny brain of mine and well i just hope things turn out for the best. i worry too much. i get it from my mom. it might the asian blood in me. my mother, if i recall, always was so quick, to the point, was not a procrastinator, and well she always wanted the best. not to say she was a snob and so picky, but most of the asian people that i know want what is best, work so damn hard, and doesn't take any thing for granted. they be owning these little stores, but take pride in what they have. I should feel the same too, but.....arrrghhh....i'm soooo worried.....anyway, i hafta go....nite nite y'all.

we ran out of work! that really sucks. it's like during the time when you really, really, want to work the work stops coming in completely, and then when you don't want to work and wish that there was no work you will be piled or showered down with work. i was trying to save up some money to go on a shopping spree for my brothers. i do this when ever i can because back then i wasn't as fortunate and i know how it feels to want this and that as i was a kid/teenager. my dad can do so much, but i like to buy stuff for my little brothers. they are the only brothers i have. they are doing really well in school and i want to do this for them. please god, have work for us in a couple of days......

i cannot believe it is already tuesday. the days are flashing by before my eyes. that reminds me. i have to study for my final friday. i also have to turn in my report on hospice care. this final that we are having on friday is a toughy. that means i really have to study. so far, the tests in the past have been a breeze, but i guess she noticed that we might not be dumb. haha. well, anyway, i found out that i have a 4.0 GPA. i am the shit. i study hard and do my work. i really deserve my 4.0. i am so happy. i just hope i can keep up that average in the next couple of months. wish me luck!